America Attacked

More of this Feature • Part 2: Twin Tower Memories    Join the Discussion "Today, the Changing of the Guard Ceremony at Buckingham Palace was altered to reflect the solidarity of the British public with the American people. The American National Anthem was played and there was two minutes of silence. Hanan     Related Resources • Parenting Tips • "A Mother's Plea: Let's Stop the Hatred"    From Other Guides • America Under Attack • In the Wake of Tragedy • Terrorism and the Classroom    Elsewhere on the Web • CNN: Children Need Reassurance

The tragic events of the last week have horrified people around the world. As parents, we have the added burden of trying to help our children understand these senseless attacks.

Stay-at-home mother of one son, Lynn, asked this thought-provoking question on the day of the attack:

"What kinds of things are your kids asking about the events in the US today (9-11-01)? What are you telling them? Or are you totally shielding them from this?"

Here are some of the responses from other parents, struggling to cope with this unparalleled disaster.

Stacy:
"I told my 6 year old that some bad people made some planes crash into some buildings and lots of people died. She said she hoped the bad people died, too. I didn't let her watch the TV though. She'll probably ask more questions over the next few days."

Jalsmommy:
"They're watching it with me. Stunned, confused, don't understand how, why, who, want to know if we are going to war, do I want US to go to war, will we be killed (not a good thought since I did go get them out of school early), I'm trying to answer them as best as I know how and with the answers that I hear on the news."

Krista:
"I wanted to shield them.

When CNN had the sirens blaring in NYC, Eric was adding his voice to them while playing with his trucks in the living room. It was eerie. The whole day has seemed like a horrible nightmare and I just want to wake up.

Jordy came home from school crying. They announced it over PA system. I told her there were some very evil people in this world. And then I sent her to go and lay down so she would not hear the gory details that would give a 7 year old nightmares."

Jen:
"Amber (6th grade) said all they did at school today was watch the news, Dani (3rd grade) had no clue about it, and Ally (2nd) watched a little about it at school. They had a few questions we answered to the best of our ability. How do you answer questions you're asking yourself. Amber had the idea that any war would be WW3 had to explain there are wars going on right now. It's going to be HARD tomorrow when they start speculating about how many are dead. I don't know if I can handle that I really don't. I think we will surpass the civil war when 22,000 died in one day. It really is true it's a different world for them than it was for us."

Becki:
"William is 5 and I told him everything. He had a lot of questions, and we used terms like "bad" men and "good" men. I would have preferred that he not see the man jumping from the building to his death, but I was too horrified to realize that he was still sitting there. I wanted him to understand that he is part of a historic event, and I need him to understand in case they call his dad back to duty (Air Force). He doesn't handle surprises very well. I don't believe in shielding my children. They need to be aware of the bad things in the world, and I want to prepare them early for being able to handle them. In addition, I needed him to know why I sat and sobbed after seeing Peter Jennings choke up on live TV."

LadyBelle:
"My boys were obviously here with me and saw the initial reports. We began to pray and lit candles for the victims. I told them the truth but I then proceeded to ask them to stay in their room today and play. I canceled lessons and spent the day watching the news and keeping my husband informed.

It is important to tell our children the truth but it is equally important to not have them overexposed to the media and what is happening. It will overwhelm them as it does us."

Katy:
"Maria (nearly 10) and Helen (nearly 8) saw it on a BBC news program which is aimed specifically at children and is very good at explaining things at their level. They obviously didn't show any of the most horrific pictures - just the buildings on fire, and I didn't put any more TV news on until the girls were in bed. Helen wasn't particularly bothered (she's very laid back about most things), but Maria wanted to know whether we live near New York (her geography is a bit hazy!), whether lots of people had died and whether any children had died. I tried to explain about bad people wanting to hurt others, but how do you explain things like this to a child when every right-thinking adult in the world is asking "WHY?"

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